Friday, April 06, 2012

All Apologies - Now Get Your Boot Off My Neck

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BTW, My diagnosis after the years of LSD the MKULTRA program fed me (and my own writer/musician alcohol habituation), given to me over the course of a decade by three PhD shrinks/neurologists was: "Occasional periods of episodic Unipolar Mania."

I can have weeks where I'll just catnap an hour or two every 10, it is not uncommon among those abused by our government with expeimental dosages of whatever it was they gave us to test.  Read the literature, my dear, you might be surprised.  Also, I remember my Pawnee Marine Korean War Vet CIA handler and his squad buddies would sometimes stay up for 4 or even 5 days without sleep, no drugs but alcohol and nicotine involved.  They taught me some tricks towards maintaining a state of 'hypervigilance' that were necessary for their 'counterinsurgency' infiltration activities (although the 'insurgency' they were infiltrating was Timothy Leary's "Brotherhood Of Etenal Love" - figure  .  .  .   go);{>

So just because I write about drugs, because they were a part of my life doen't mean I have to use them anymore to stay awake and "on a roll" writing for a night or two, and it is mean-spirited and self-righteous of anyone to assume that is the case.  I also have a broken T-1 vertebrae - industrial accident in '72 - never stopped me from working or writing or playing, but it makes it hurt to type, my hands go numb, and it keeps me awake also.

I'm sure you don't care about that, or even believe me, as will others neither, and I guess it's all part of the PR persona of the author of the GREATEST AMERICAN MEMOIR  WRITTEN (in 60 spiral notebooks I've been lugging around for years) BUT NOT YET PUBLISHED.  If I were some Evangelical Saint would people believe my story?  No se.

Nevertheless, my statement stands.  I am NOT fluent in either Greek, or Aramaic, AND NEVER CLAIMED TO BE< but I have stuggled to puzzle out a few things over the years, with the help of some fine, non-judgemental Jewish & Christian scholars, who were not put\
off by the questions of a 'Preacher's Kid", who seriously wanted to learn, "the truth".

The reason I did not go to Seminary, as I had planned,
was I realized that to truly never have to say: "Lo here, or lo there, for lo the Kingdom Of Heaven is within (me)." I would have to diligently "study, to show myself approved" so that I could "Know the truth, and the truth (would) make (me) free."

In any event, just because I believe this Holy Book (one of many in this world) is not well and TRULY translated from the originals, and that no 'divine inspiration' always guided the translators or copyists, doesn't mean that I don't believe in the 'principles' I believe were 
being expressed in a reverentially aspirational fashion by the authors.

I am a Gnostic, I don't believe in the everyday interaction of IHVH with EVERY HUMAN UPON HIM WHO BELIEVES.  MY faith has shown to me the intercession of Angelic beings who have guarded and prolonged my sorry existence to this very day when those much more worthy to survived have passed on.

The health of my liver, for instance, at 60 years of age with all the drugs the CIA fed me, all the ones I subsequently fed myself, and all the volatile esters and solvents I have been forced to inhale in 40 years as a Machinist, IS NOTHING SHORT OF MIRACULOUS, I

Anyway, my Blog subjects this week are coming to me, as my Angel's long term plan for
my contribution to the culture of this world seem to decree. One thing my father, the MOST Christian man I have ever known, taught me to believe in is something YOU too should know as an article of YOUR  faith:  "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it."  I know those with whom I disagree would say he did a poor job, but that is for someone other than you or I to judge, eh buddy?

I will work on your translation, when I have the time, honest.  I still have an Enochian text that only I and one other have ever seen,  and after 30 years it still is not completely done.

Thanks, BTW, for giving me the indignation at your judging me (you did address your e-mail to: "HyBum" not what I was taught a Christian should do to provide an example of
the 'goodness' of your faith, but hey, now I'm doing it too) TO HELP ME WRITE ANOTHER
500 WORDS WITHOUT FALLING ASLEEP!  The Angels work in mysterious ways, IHVH's wonder's to .  .  .  "?

Faith, hope and 'agape', but the greatest of these is 'agape'."   - JWT

"Deeds cannot dream what dreams can do." - E.E Cummings

"We've already won. All that's left is the mopping up." - Timothy Leary

"The host is riding from Knocknarea
And over the grave of Clooth-na-Bare;
Caoilte tossing his burning hair,
And Niamh calling Away, come away: - William Butler Yeats
Empty your heart of its mortal dream. "The Hosting Of The Sidhe'
. . . "

--- On Sun, 11/21/10, "Феликс" wrote:

From: "Феликс"
Subject: Руководителю отдела ВЭД
Date: Sunday, November 21, 2010, 10:18 PM

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